onewhoisall | (no subject)

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kaine

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Cassandra was not an emotional person. She didn't react the way others did, she didn't act the way a normal girl would to things. She wasn't normal but she didn't mind that. Not until now, she didn't know what to say or do about what, who she had seen. She didn't know what to do but she knew who she wanted to see.

Her face was blank, her fingertips rushed as she hurried into his apartment. She didn't look at him as she moved quickly over to him, throwing her arms around his middle and holding him tightly. She pressed her face against his chest, making the world go away for a little while. She didn't say anything, she didn't have to because he would know. He knew her better than anyone here. Almost as well as Steph.

Barbara was here. Barbara was here. It was good but it was all wrong.

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"No way, this is way too fun," I say, grinning at her. It almost hurts, smiling that much. Cass makes me happy, but I'm not much of a smiler. Seeing the big (or rather tiny) badass Cassandra squirming on the bed begging me to stop tickling her brings a big smile to my face.

Cass grinned back at him, smiling even when everything had hurt because she had him. And he was smiling at her.

Cass moved suddenly, sitting up and forward before touching the side of his face. Pressing her lips against his, she laughed as he tickled her feet.

"You're an idiot," Cass said against his lips, trying to wriggle free.

She's moves so fast and fluidly and I love watching her do it. One minute she's down on the bed and the next she's up by my face, feet still in my hands.

"You're ticklish," I reply, kissing her back.

Cass didn't admit to it but she did acknowledge it slightly, eyelashes kissing her cheeks before she kissed him slight and simply. Stretching her hands up around his neck, she tried to tug him down into bed with her. And more importantly away from her feet.

One of the nice things about Cass is how flexible she is. Which means that even as she pulls me down to the bed while kissing me, I can stick her feet up by her head and tickle them.

I think I've found my new favorite way to annoy her.

She smiled against his lips, her chest trembling as she stiffled the laughter against his mouth. Parting his lips with her tongue, she inhaled and tugged him closer to her. She closed her eyes, ignoring the hurt of the day and the way Barbara didn't know her and listening to him and the way he loved her.

"Quit it," Cass said as he brought her feet up to tickle. Wriggling beneath him, she purposefully rolled her hips up and made sure he ignored her feet.

"Why, you're smiling?"

I ignore what she's doing with her hips as well as I can. Not that it isn't distracting, but tickling her is far, far more fun at the moment. She does the hip thing to me on a regular basis, this is something different.

Also, she is smiling. Not just with her mouth, but with everything. That makes me more happy than I'm comfortable with, but I can worry about that later.

"It's involuntary," Cass said, smiling all the same but it was the truth. Her body, since she was a child, had always been practised and measured and precise. This wasn't her or it was her, who she was beneath all the control and the measure of who she thought she was. Beneath the killer and the mask she could still be a girl who smiled and laughed. "You're happy."

Cass said it softly, looking at him with a pleased smiled before she leaned up to brush a kiss against his lips. "I can see it."

"Because you're happy."

Saying it surprises me. Being happy because someone else is happy, because I made them happy, is a weird feeling. I can't even tell if it's a good one or not, but it certainly doesn't feel bad.

I kiss her back, hands stilling on her feet so I can focus on the kiss, the way her lips feel against mine and her hands moving against me.

"Like when you're happy."

She was, she was happy. Barbara... that hurt. The realisation that one of the very few people she loved and cared for didn't know her hurt. But she was happy, he made her happy. Something that Bruce would never approve of but she didn't care about.

"I... am." Cass said simply, nose scrunching up a little before she slipped one foot out of his grasp and letting it fall back onto the bed. She'd get the other free in a minute. "I'm sad... about Barbara but I'm happy with you."

Cass leaned up, kissing him again before pulling him further down with her.

"Why?"

I ask the question without thinking. I really don't want to know why because I can't really think of a good reason myself. She says I make her happy and I don't think she would lie, but I can understand how that's possible.

Rolling onto my back, I look up at her and brush her hair back out of her face. Maybe she'll just kiss me again and forget about the question.

Cass sighed, lifting her shoulders in a light shrug as he rolled over onto his back. She spread her fingertips up across his chest, leaning in to the touch at her hair and face she smiled softly. Leaning down to brush a kiss against her lips, she didn't ignore the question but answered it her way first.

"Because you understand me, because you try. And because I love you," Cass replied simply. "You make me happy."

I freeze up instantly when she says 'I love you'. I'm sure she's told me dozens of times before in her own way, but it's not the same for me as hearing her say it.

It terrifies me. It terrifies me because she shouldn't love me. I'm not worth it and I'm going to get her hurt. She shouldn't be in love with me, that's a mistake.

I'm also terrified because now she's going to punch me for thinking all that. Probably hard.

She can feel the way he tenses beneath her fingertips, his body terrified and unsure as she looked across at him. He was scared, sometimes so was she. There was a reason Bruce did not have... others. A reason that extended far beyond the trauma of broken pearls in a pool of blood.

"I love you," Cass repeated instead of calling him idiot. He needed to hear it. She leaned forward, rubbing her lips against his softly before she kissed him. "Stop worrying. I can take care of myself. You should worry about you, I have a lot of enemies."

"I'm used to people trying to kill me," I say. It's not bravado or bragging, that's just generally how my life has been. No doubt, sooner or later, someone will show up here from my world that has a beef with me.

"Not used to them loving me."

I still think it's a mistake, how she feels about me, but I know better by now than to try and argue.

"I'm used to killing people, not loving them." Cass replied simply, lifting her shoulders up in a shrug. She had only killed once but it was enough and she knew what she was deep beneath her skin. "Don't argue with me, kick your ass."

Cass smiled, stretching out mostly against him and partly on top of him as she kissed him.

"Don't argue with me, tickle you," I counter as I kiss her back and wrap my arms around her tighter. As far as threats go, it's not the best one I've come up with, but it's probably the most effective deterrent I can come up with for her.

Cass scowled at him, jaw jutting out slightly as he threatened her with tickling.

"Hnn," Cass murmured, turning her head slightly as he kissed her. She faked the displeasure for a moment longer before she sighed into the kiss, parting her lips slightly as she let him wrap his arms tight around her. Stretching a leg across him, she pressed her toes against the bed before shifting and moving suddenly until he was on top of her. Parting her legs she looked up at him before tugging him down for another kiss.

I find it oddly adorable when Cass pouts like that. Maybe because she does it so rarely and somehow it doesn't seem as petulant as it would on others. The fact that I find anything adorable is a testament to how far I've come since arriving here.

I keep kissing her, not minding as she shifts us around on the bed. I can feel her beneath me and even despite all the hard muscle of her body, she feels so incredibly small. Sometimes I forget that she's just a person.

"You like it when I tickle you."

"No, I don't." Cass replied, scrunching her nose up at him. She smiled after a moment or two before leaning up to kiss him. Pressing her feet against his hips, she slid her legs around his waist before curling her leg around him. She tugged him close and smirked. "I like you."

"Bet no one else knows you're ticklish," I say smiling at the way her nose scrunches up before running my fingers through her hair as she clings tightly to me.

"You're not too bad yourself."

"No, no one but you." Cass said softly, smiling a little up at him. She made a tch noise as he ran his fingers through her hair before she stretched up to kiss him again. Soft, pliant and sweet, she tugged him down with her. She didn't care if he crushed her as long as he was with her.

I nuzzled against her neck as I lay on top of her. I'm sure she'll push me off when my weight gets to be too much, or punch me in the side, more likely. Right now, I like being this close to her though, almost feels like I'm protecting her, not that she needs it. At least not physically.

I feel like I should tell her something though, about how I feel. I don't know if I love her. Actually, I probably do but I'm just too afraid to admit it. I know that she probably knows better than I do what I'm feeling and I don't need to say it, but I feel like I should say something.

"We should probably stop keeping two apartments."

There, that was something.

Cass scrunched her nose up in confusion, looking up at Kaine curiously as she considered the idea. Stretching her arms up, she leaned into the touch at her neck before nodding.

"Hn, okay." Cass said simply. "You going to get annoyed if I'm naked?"

She looks at me in a way that says she's really not sure if it's a good idea. I realize too late that it was stupid to ask, I shouldn't make big decisions like that at a moment's notice. And then she accepts and I'm sure I really screwed up.

"Probably," I admit. "You going to get annoyed if I'm annoyed?"