Apparently I'm some sort of lounge chair or something for her now, I'm not sure. She's just... laying against me as she eats her pizza, moving against me. I'm now convinced that she got me out of that alley just to mess with me or something.

Determined not to let her get to me, I take a bite of pizza and try to focus on the taste of my first real food in a long time, rather than what she feels like pressed up against me.

"Obvious would definitely help," I say around the food. "Because right now you're just confusing me."